A couple of days ago, I fell in grace.
It wasn’t a gentle fall either–it was rough. I found myself alone, on the floor of my closet, weeping.
It has nothing to do with the fact that I am an emotional woman, but everything to do with humbling myself to the point of falling.
I found myself recapturing my life’s moments–the good and the bad–and felt myself smiling, and also pursing my lips in wonder.
I realized something.
I am not the good one in this. I am not better than nor put on a higher ladder in God’s eye–I am a woman completely undone and helpless without Him.
I sometimes forget the fact that God does not choose favorites–our God does not favor–because He already chose us the day He was nailed to a cross.
We are all in this together, and once that whirlwind of a realization struck me–it planted a certain compassion I haven’t felt before. Granted, I don’t know what in the world I am doing with half of the most important people in my life, but I know I’m trying.
I know I’m trying to fight against the bad, and to share the good. I know I’m still desperate in many areas of my life–I know this to be true because they stare at me daily. But, I also know that I have already been chosen and called into unity with the body of Christ. That also means with you.
I remember this when I close my eyes, and I see Christ falling to His knees in grace for us–carrying His cross, to fulfill His mission.
A post by John Piper has also opened my eyes into this new light that God does not need us to glorify Him, as He is already supremely glorified enough by being God himself. So, in actuality, when we say that we need the Lord–we do in the sense that He becomes our servant. I know, when I first read that, I thought but I am Christ’s servant. I encourage you to read the article. It’s a wonderfully telling piece that opened my eyes and humbled my heart.
We need to remember that we are here to serve others. This can’t just be a picture framed on our walls, it has to be embedded–felt deeply–into our souls. So that we can share the love of Christ without thinking twice next time.
This is what I am working on this year.
“So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it.” Hebrews 4:16